the little things i'd miss most...

042412. tuesday.

i am now officially a graduate.

it has just been, what, six or maybe seven hours only since i graduated and i'm freaking out now 'coz i miss school already!!! don't think i'm exaggerating. i just can't help but be emotional about this. i know i should be happy, i am. as a matter of fact, i feel ecstatic! it's just that i can't help but be sad. maybe it's starting to seriously sink in to me that there really is no more coming back to everything that used to be in lyceum. at some point, these feelings show the "human" in me (HAHAHA). I'M SAD. for so many valid reasons.

instead of focusing at the wholeness of the bigger picture, i realized that the little details of what made up that awesome four years were the things that truly bonded one person to the other. those little things that we unconsciously enjoy doing over and over again only when we are with this group of people.

i'd like to share some of these "little" things/instances that may never happen again, that we may never do again together, that may never be as fun if we do them with others. some might think these are too shallow and nonsense, i'd say what makes one happy doesn't have to be compliant to what others think are worthy. HAHAHA. you, pathetic meddlers! hahaha! kidding!

I'M GONNA MISS...

GOING LATE TO SCHOOL. every exam, every class, everyday. haha! i don't know why but i was just never the early bird type. haha! sometimes, i think it's the fact that being late gives excitement  to everyday class routines. (i'm not saying this is a good thing! HAHAHA!) everyday, you don't know what's gonna happen if you come in late. will the prof get mad and shout at you? will he/she just ignore you? did you miss the quiz? are you the only one left with no group? hahahaha! FYI, i wasn't the only one late often, there were others too! haha! don't deny it! HAHA. there's also this feeling that i'm not as scared because i know i won't lose much. i hope my profs won't think that i have no fear in them. HAHAHAHAHA! it's just my mindset. there won't be much to lose. i know when i enter the workplace, this won't happen anymore. :( tardiness would be a great sin! tradiness would even be equivalent to salary deduction. oh no! there might not be a single penny left of me if ever! poor me! hahaha!

PLAYING PRANKS ON OUR CLASSMATES. hahaha! please don't think i'm not a good person for i haven't stated anything admirable yet. hahaha! we've witnessed how these pranks/bullying can be as harmless or as harmful depending on how the person receives it. haha! we just want to know how our classmates would react to certain silly circumstances. hahaha! some would just laugh after finding out while some would be gravely affected. couldn't blame them 'coz maybe we've gone overboard. junas would always be my partner in crime along with others! haha! yvonne was the one who got so mad at us. we were maybe kinda insensitive that we hurt her too much. to all those who were once our victims, sorry! haha! all for fun! :))) hahaha! when i'm already working, can't play pranks anymore. to whom will i do it? to my boss? haha! if so, i must be ready to file my resignation letter before my boss fires me! haha!

THOSE HURTFUL PHYSICAL MOMENTS. pump it up (courtesy of jot), super ass pinching (popularized by je), strong pat on the forehead (courtesy of ago), gigil moments (paul only). these are things they do often. that's why sometimes, i'm hesitant to get near them 'coz they might just hit me anywhere when i don't expect them! hahaha! kidding! but really what they do hurts, even leaving marks or spots! haha! though they've been doing those ever since, we never really got used to the pain! it's always like the first time! mabibigat ang kamay! haha!

PROCRASTINATION. when tomorrow's the deadline, i'll do it tonight. when tomorrow's the exam, i'll study later. wadahell? can't do anything a little bit earlier? haha! well, student's sickness as they call it. haha! procrastination results to cramming. most of the time, products of cramming are not-so-polished scraps! haha! in school, what'd be affected are your grades. in the workplace, cramming may result to poor performance. when the clients don't like it, the company is affected plus your performance too. so it should be "no to procrastination!" hahaha!

DISOBEDIENCE. haha! mild disobedience. not wearing uniform when we should. wearing slippers when we shouldn't. the guards would always be strict regarding these but when it comes to us sometimes they become too kind that they let us get in. haha! for three years we were rebellious. haha! it was only in fourth year that we have become obedient somehow, somehow! haha!

i noticed that most of the "little things" i talked about are things that wouldn't make a good example. HAHA. am i that bad as a student? i hope not. haha! maybe i just got used to the understanding people around me. though foolish, these things, when seen all together, were what made life easier, more memorable, more fun back in school. no words are enough to describe what college life truly means. it has transcended the context in which it is believed to be only a phase that we go through as humans.

this is the time to evaluate what happened in the past four years, choose to leave the bad things behind and carry the useful and good ones together with the rest that's yet to come. 

everything ends and starts today. now, the melancholy of  leaving school as i graduate intersects  the fear and anxiety of pursuing a more serious career as i look for a job. 

there won't be any space for your comfort zones. comfort zones won't help you get anywhere. you'll be stuck   without any chance to explore what else the world offers. 

i know there's more to learn outside. as what i once heard, we'd always be shaped in our homes (in my case, that's lyceum), but we wouldn't learn everything there which is why we have to go out in order to experience a life well-lived. 

this batch will surely be missed. :(

*photo credits to liez, kuya arjay, kreng, pual, marfi.