my thoughts' safe haven...

010512. thursday.

i used to have a diary when i was in elementary but i found it hard to keep. i didn't always get to write on it. most of the time, the blank pages were dominant than the ones filled with words, so i just stopped keeping one.

when i got to college, it's the time i once again saw the value of having a diary or even just a journal. it was also the time when i realized i wanna write about everything - may it be about my day-to-day affair or just about whatever that pops out of my head. i was not able to check on myself for the past years and what's happening to me from time to time. the feeling is like each day passes without knowing what i've done for the day. and i must say that sucks. that's why i decided january last year to buy a journal and have it for its purpose. guess i succeeded 'coz i wrote on almost every page of it. enjoyed writing that much, huh? haha!

this year, i bought a diary and a notebook. these two will be my new bestfriends for the year. they'll know about me more than what i'll remember about myself. :) what's cool is i'm sure they won't disclose what they know to anybody. well, unless somebody opens them without my permission.

i want a place where i can just say whatever i wanna say without being conscious if someone might get hurt. i want a place where i can just dream even about the most trivial things and be as ambitious as can be without anybody judging me right away. i want a place where i can just lament and be as emotional where no one would think i'm weird 'coz they are not used to it and they think i'm not that type. i want a place where i can be as carefree with my words. i want someone to talk to who would just listen to me patiently and would not interrupt even for one second. i want to talk to someone who would not make a face if i'd say something absurd. i want something where i can just read about myself......and i found all that in a pen and a notebook. they won't say a word to me. they won't blame me for anything.